We Are The Moms Of Winter. And We Are So Done.
Winter is unreasonable. Let me tell you why moms everywhere are so done.
It’s the socks.
As a mom of three boys and one husband, I will tell you what I am most looking forward to when warm weather finally comes: Less laundry.
It’s not a glamorous answer. That’s just the cold, hard, truth. As much as I enjoy trips to the beach, tending the garden, early morning/late evening runs, outdoor patio dinning, kids happily playing outside on the trampoline.…….the break from all the sock-sorting is the absolute best part. Hands down. Without question. The end.
Winter laundering is not for sissies. The problem is all the layering. Winter clothing is so bulky just a few items fills the whole washer. But no one wears just a few items in winter. Everyone is wearing layers.
A t-shirt under a button-up, a hoodie under the coat, and since my kids are not the same size, all that sorting is a time-sucker! I stare deep and heavy into the abyss of mounds of clean, wrinkled, un-sorted and mismatched laundry and despair.
The sheer bulk of it is unreasonable and excessive. And the socks, oh man.
In a family of five at two feet each that’s ten feet that need clean, mated, matching socks every single day. That’s fifty toes to keep warm! And that’s assuming no one strips their socks directly after school, loses them and then grabs new ones before heading out to cub scouts later on in the evening. I still have a pre-schooler at home so let’s just face it. He’s burning through two pair o’ socks a day. EASY. But let's just be conservative for the sake of math. That’s four socks a day x thirty days in a month. That’s ONE HUNDRED AND TWENTY socks just for that ONE KID. And rest assured. Those socks- will need mated.
I'm geeking out for warm weather simply for the convenience of not even having to wear shirts every day. I do, wear shirts I mean, obviously. But if you catch us at home at any point in the summer, my boys are probably not wearing shirts. Don’t judge me. I’m conserving soap and water because I just love this planet so much. Conserving soap and water by not putting socks and shirts on my children in the summer helps with global warming. Probably. No need to make me a hero. I’m just happy to help.
Winter hates the planet, basically.
And for that reason, I can no longer support it. My five-year-old has happily worn one Phineas & Ferb glove to school every morning this week. Does he know who Michael Jackson is? No. The other glove is LOST, dude. And sometime towards the end of the February I lost my motivation to find it.
The accessories for cold weather are excessive. Beyond bulky coats- a nice one and a play one, mind you, there are then added gloves, hats, boots, scarves, and extra shoes since there is so. much. mud.
And sure, spring and summer brings baseball socks into our lives, but with knee-high length, those puppies are hard to lose and easy to spot when sorting. For this reason, I have so much grace for baseball socks.
I have literally been so overwhelmed with sorting my kids multi-styled, colored, assorted lengths-of-socks that once instead of tackling this dreaded chore, I shucked the whole hamper in the trash can and went to Walmart and bought all new socks.
They were clean and pre-mated.
I don’t feel bad for this. Sometimes moms go into survival-mode. We do what we have to do, and when we can’t do anymore, just when we think all the socks will take us hostage forever, spring comes.
Stay strong, ladies. It's a' coming. And I know it won't last forever. So in it’s honor, we will not be wearing socks upon it's arrival.